So I’m driving in a residential neighborhood. In a window on a particular house, I notice a sign that reads, “United We Stand.” It’s a trite sentiment, but it’s true. I almost couldn’t read the sign as I drove by, though, since there were protective anti-theft bars mounted over the window. And who says there’s…
Month: April 2003
Lost in a Desert, But Still Rocking Out
You know what’s great about that movie The Ten Commandments? When the Israelites are fleeing from the Egyptians through the split waters of the Red Sea, the Jews are depicted as a bunch of old guys with bent backs and old mothers with small children. But later on, when they’re all partying and praising the…
Nitpicking
I’m no cartographer, nor am I a computer programmer, but I do know a thing or two about local geography when it comes to city streets. I just referred to Mapquest for driving instructions to my brother’s work, which seem straightforward enough. So long as I drive my hydrogen-powered, emission-free flying car, I should have…
Redefining What it Means to Be an American
I’m an American. I’m also Chinese. But don’t think for a second that I’m a second-class citizen. And for that matter, nobody should feel that way about themselves, either. The other day, while in conversation with my mother, I learned that one of her Asian friends “married an American man.” In other words, some oriental…
Making Fun of a Vegetarian
Kevin: come to the dark side Tara: only if there’s good food there Kevin: excellent food Kevin: filet of tomato Kevin: prime potato Kevin: carrot chops Tara: LoL Kevin: rack of celery Okay, so off the cuff, I’m not very good at naming vegetarian dishes. I should work on improvising.
525,600 Minutes
To Those Who Have Found My Blog Through Yahoo and Google:
I’m sorry that I muddled up your search and diverted your attention from what you were originally looking for. I have no pictures of Rocky J. Squirrel, no gray comforters for sale, nor even pictures of Pamela Anderson or Dr. Aki Ross in a bikini. I only wish I could offer you a “‘go screw…
Didja Hear?
The war with Iraq was resolved peacefully. Such an unexpected and unprecedented event has inspired all the world’s nations, and now world peace has been officially declared. Just kidding. April Fools!