Monthly Archives: November 2002
Solving Our Conflict with Iraq
Adam: i think all of our problems would be solved if they changed the “i” to “nice” Adam: “Nice raq” Adam: and then import swedish bikini models Adam: of course, that’s my answer to everything Adam: flat tire? import the … Continue reading
Holla Back
More often these days, when I listen to mainstream rap, I wish for the chance to confront some of those so-called rap superstars and ask them, “don’t you ever get tired of running your mouth when you have absolutely nothing … Continue reading
Lack of Subtlety
I have a problem with that Cottonelle toilet paper commercial. It’s like 30 seconds of a bunch of people, young and old, shaking their asses at the camera. It’s just so wrong.
How Ironic
We all have our antisocial phases. I’ve been in a foul mood for well over a week now. I’ve pretty much wanted to stay in bed all this time and hang a “go screw yourself” sign on my bedroom door. … Continue reading
You Should Be an English Major, Charlie Brown
It’s so hard concentrating on the words. Every time I sit down to study, I keep hearing Ms. Othmar, Linus’ teacher, droning on with that muted trombone voice of hers. “Mwa mwa-mwa mwa mwa-mwa…“
So Dense
My antisocial tendencies are getting worse. Just today, I met up with a former classmate who wanted to return a book that I loaned her last quarter. I’ve always thought this girl was super cute, and I think she’s been … Continue reading
“Please, Call Me Osama”
A few months ago I was watching Dan Rather interview some US official about Osama bin Laden. At one point during the interview, Rather asked, “And if we were to capture Mr. bin Laden, how would we try him?” At … Continue reading
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